Week 9

its week 9 of my first pregnancy...
I am deliriously happy. Every since i got married I've been waiting
for this baby. i cried myself to sleep wondering why i hadn't gotten
pregnant, i thought the world and my fate was cruel. I thought
God was the one being cruel, and I thought and i said horrible things.

To everyone and the world i repeated words i did not truly believe
when i was asked when i was going to have a baby.
 "when its God's will" but i was instead thinking of why it wasn't God's
will!!
Yet after months of crying, and fury, God opened my eyes, and i
truly understood. it really was God's will after all. And I wanted
it to be God's will. Its not that I gave up, I found in my heart
peace and solace. for the first time in a long time i truly
understood how God worked. And i was happy with His will.

That is truly how my fate changed, or it wasn't that it changed
this was God's plan all the time. I had recently gotten a new job at
a dentist's office, and one of the dentists there asked me if i wanted
him to put braces on me just so he could use my teeth for his portfolio.
I immediately said yes, he required me to take a special
X Ray, and
then out of simple curiosity because i hadn't been feeling my
greatest, i decided to take a pregnancy test. I felt peaceful this
time, not like before when i had desperately hoped i was pregnant
I had honestly accepted and was perfectly OK if i was not pregnant
yet to my surprise, I didn't have to wait not even a minute!!
I WAS PREGNANT!! I told my husband and we prayed thanking God
it was a miracle in my eyes,it was honestly the happiest day of my life.
i am so happy. it hasn't been easy, the nausea is horrible cant seem to
keep many things down, but i await the day that i will feel this baby
moving inside of me and i will await the day that i will have this baby
in my arms!

I know this post isn't perfect but i have this feelings inside of me that I want to get out, and tell the world about them

2/52

ok I admit I am a little late on this but I'm still trying. I really need to get my act together.

Eating at a restaurant....

By the way for the first time I actually saw one of my daycare kids at the restaurant it was extremely awkward jaja. but he did recognize me so it was sweet.

52 for 2013

HI!!!
Happy New Year! So, I follow Bleubird and I saw that she's doing the 52 for 2013 project. Which is one photo every week for 2013. She's doing it of her beautiful 4 children but since I don't have any children, I'm going to do it of my husband and myself. I want to see if I keep up with it and how much we change during the year. :) I think its going to be really fun!!!
I don't have a good camera and I'm definitely not a good photographer but, I know its going to be fun!!

So this was taken a few hours into the New Year, after we finished our church service
1/52

New year is coming

I just can't seem to get over the fact that Christmas came and went. It was so fast!! but I am very happy that a New Year is beginning. I have plenty of goals or resolutions! Do you have any?


1. Finish my CDA so I can get paid a little bit more at my job.

2. Keep going to school so I can get my Bachelors Degree.
        the thing is, I originally planned to be a teacher then a School Librarian, but now, since working at a    day care everything has changed. I want to help children, Children that don't have parents that take care of them. I am thinking of becoming a CPS worker or a Social worker. I want to help, to provided some sort of help to many children who have unstable homes or who are not loved and taken cared of.

3. Try to be a better person and Christian, you know? Sometimes I feel i could be a better person, help more people out, be more dedicated. Be more patient.

4. Provide more support to my parents and parents in law. More love and support

5. Be a better wife, you know?? Don't get mad by the tiny little things, like forgetting to turn of the lights. (im crazy like that)


Thats it. Simply little things, that I want to accomplish. I've felt that this year I could have done so much more and I didn't. But thank God He always gives us a new day to try!! Glory be to God.

I leave you with some pictures of me In my blue dress. Overall I wasn't satisfied by it, but oh well...

Amazed and Excited.

Hi!

I'm so excited because things seem to be moving on for me FINALLY! not that i have a bad life, but i felt like i was stuck in the same pattern and i was on the edge of desperation and boredom. Anyways!! I'm going back to school YAY... I've missed it so much since I got married. Its going to feel good to do something again...Unfortunately I'm only going back to get my CDA(Child Development Associate) in order to get paid a little bit more than minimum wage. I am excited to return to the writing of essays and studying. If you really like school you know exactly what I mean.

My weekend was over fast, My family and I celebrated the 91 Birthday of my husbands grandma... Its a big reason to be joyful, I am amazed with the way God works everyday. To grant her one more year of life is amazing. She was happy but it must be amazing and tiring in a way to have lived so many years, she was born on December 8, 1922. And she was surrounded by part of her family, 3 of her children, 7 of her grandchildren, and 14 great-grandchildren, of course there were alot more missing, living in different states or in Mexico. But that is something great when you are surrounded by so many generations that generally started in your womb lol. It was great and I hope God grants her many more years.

God bless!! and good luck with this week :)

the perfect blue dress :)

Its been almost two months since Ive written on this blog.
I don't really live a very interesting life sooo i really dont know what to write sometimes.
But Thanksgiving just passed and I'm so impressed with how fast time is moving now. Is it because I'm getting older? Or does time is time passing faster now? This year is about to end and a new to start... It's interesting how time works...
Anyways I had a great Thanksgiving... Passed it with my husbands family... and I can't wait till Christmas because we'll be spending it with my family... My sister is getting married on the 22 so that's really exciting... I'm in the search of the perfect dress.. royal blue, long, not to tight, with sleeves :) so long as its nice and classy and modest :) its too much to ask but ill keep looking hopefully I'll find something. too bad i don't know how to sew otherwise I could make the perfect dress. :0
God bles

tonight

So I stayed at home tonight...
with the excuse that I had a million things to do.
I feel embarrassed. but I guess thats a price you have to pay when you know that your excuses are trash...
ITs weird. I wake up with so much energy and then *poof* its gone, its replaced by a laziness so extreme that I wonder if its normal. I have good life, I laugh enough and have fun enough, sometimes it feels weird though, like i'm missing something. Tonight is one of those nights, where you feel that you haven't done enough, you haven't helped enough in this world, you haven't succeeded enough. You feel almost useless. You've ever felt that feeling?

Off to do the weeks laundry